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My story here in Berlin has sucked the life out of me. I moved here invited by some friends to work at a company of theirs mind you these friends were not from Chermany.
I've lived here for over 7 years but only got my anmeldung on the 4 year mark. Although I'm highly skilled I have not been able to find work. I worked in the cleaning professions for years. Now I have been hired into a low skill level job where people actively ignore my skills.
In my time here I've had 2 'friends' who I hang out with sometimes. None of them never lifted a finger for me unless I was on the precipice. I have no family and as a result of Berlin just these 2 friends who mostly spend time with me when they have no chermans to spend time with. mind you they are cherman and mostly just have cherman friends, Although they are German they have never been helpful. So I did all my paperwork whilst being berated and abused constantly by beamters on my own. I've been homeless here and slept on the streets. The job center never helped me and actually menaced me. Out of my own hard work in Cleaning I've been able to get out of homelessness. Although so I am unable to find work in my actual profession.
For long I suffered from depression and heightened social anxiety and till recently have been suicidal. Now I'm numb and aggressive. I berate and belittle Germans and remind them of how inferior they are any chance I get. I hate this place. And I have a huge hatred towards the inferior race(Sheisslanders). They are vile. I avoid using any service which is related to Germany such as banks etc. I great them loud and clearly in my own language. And ignore them if they speak to me in their garbage language.
I have gone through multiple abusive relationships with women here. Clearly they don't understand what a relationship is.
I'm even afraid to go to a therapist. Let's say I've given up on life. I live with loosers. who do nothing but useless poop all day. No ambition no nothing this as middle aged men. The only thing now that keeps me going is leaving this country. This website has really helped me. Puddled thoughts. I can't even be concise with my thoughts anymore.
"I'm even afraid to go to a therapist."
Never go to a German therapist. These people are disgustingly sick individuals. Somehow no matter what is bothering you, the answer is always a Kur away from your family and friends. They'll send you off to some isolated mental institute where they control your life all day. These Kurs last anywhere from 2 weeks to several months. They careful monitor how much you eat, sleep, how much TV you watch, they take away your smartphone, force you into group therapy, etc. I've known a few people who did various types of Kurs and afterwards they were never the same. And they'll also prescribe you SSRI anti-depressants. Germans love prescribing SSRIs and ritalin. I myself have battled with depression here (honestly I don't see how anyone in Germany could not become completely depressed here and I don't even think depression is the right word if your outlook on life is correctly calibrated to your circumstances).
Brother, get some cash together(I'm assuming you're still a homeless) and get a flight to the UK(I live in Edinburgh) . You'll quickly find a job, trust me. And if you decide to come to Edinburgh I have lots of clothes and shoes that I can give to you.
The quality of life that I have here is not even comparable to when I was in Berlin. I came here and found work in 1 week and currently doing a lot of courses to get more professional skills. Do not be afraid.
Hey my friend, you really need to get out of here. Now with Corona it's tough. If there is no possibility to get out now, try to spend as much time outside of Berlin, take walks in the nature in Brandenburg. Just get out as much as possible. In the meantime, try to save some money. Live frugally, and perhaps borrow something from friends or family back home. Soon international flights are allowed again. And then GET OUT! Your mental health is too important!
Don't want to get off into the woods too much, but English-speaking countries are the only first world countries in the world right now. Maybe not because they're so much further developed than elsewhere, but because the people in English-speaking countries are for some reason about a million times more supportive and friendly and elsewhere. It makes such a huge difference in every aspect of life.
You are lucky you are from the UK. You could even travel back home by bus. Hell, if I were you I would ride a bike back home.
Those of us who moved to Germany from America or Asia or Africa are not as lucky.
" the people in English-speaking countries are for some reason about a million times more supportive and friendly"
Probably because they don't lose the wars they start, nor do their attempts to build an empire fail miserably.
"Doing a cleaning job as a skilled worker"
I almost ended up washing dishes in Berlin, even though I have a degree from a German university.
Now in my "poor" eastern European country I have a well-paid job and could eat out everyday if I wanted to. When in Berlin I had to think twice before buying a coffee outdoors.
I used to live in an Eastern European country and I had a great job as a skilled worker, I ate out every day, and locals were amazing people, even though I also come from a poor country and they had no idea I had a good job. What the bloody hell was i thinking and I moved to Chermany? No freakin idea, I want to go back now. Needless to say dating in that country was levels above this hellhole
Eastern Europe is so underrated. People are awesome, women are feminine (even the feminists!), men are gentlemen, they are well educated, most speak 2 or more foreign languages besides their mother tongue and have manners.
Of course, this compared to their peers in Western Europe on the same social level.
The ones who came to Western Europe in search of a better life or to work jobs that no one wants such as construction, agriculture, cleaning and what else are the poor people with not so much luck in live to get educated or having too many opportunities. It’s political, economical, you name it. No denying that there are weaker economies and you feel it at social level.
Anyhow as said, on the same level, the people are high quality, friendly.
Germans are not yet “colonizing” Eastern Europe as much, as they are xenophobic towards EE and have superiority complexes over it.
Good. Stay home. Leave it for the other to enjoy.
You find everything there: Culture, history, eclectic mixes, fascinating traditions, food with actual flavor. It’s going to get ruined too at some point, but for now it’s still a part of a different Europe than the West.
Two words sum up Berliners
Sour Krauts
Germans are so obsessed with American culture that they don't even notice it anymore. I heard a Volkswagen ad on the radio the other day where they were talking about good memories you have in your car. At one point they mentioned your first kiss. The ad was in German on regular German radio. What German ever had their first kiss in their car? You can't even get your license here before you're 18. What German has their first kiss at that age? Or do they mean all the pedos who pick up young girls beforehand? That's the only likely explanation I can find. Simply retarded.
When you move to a new country, there’s always a grace period of at least 3 months in which you absolutely love your new country and everything that comes with it. After that period, some things start to irritate you and you find out about negative things about the country. That’s normal. No country is perfect. You learn to live with them.
Germany is an exception. Here, the grace period lasts one week. Then negativity hits you in the form of weird strangers, terrible customer service, a crazy neighbor, landlord, or boss... I have lived in 14 different countries. I’ve never experienced such negativity elsewhere. Never before was the grace period so short. Never before have most locals been so broken. I’m moving to another country in September. I won’t miss this god forsaken place
It was about a week before my grace period ended. After that I had lots of conflicting thoughts and emotions and it got much worse from then on. Some Germany lover (on reddit I think) was suggesting that you need to spend 10 years here before you can judge it. I had it figured out after a month ie. This country is an overrated shitshow.
When I first came to Berlin I said to a long term expat from the UK, I thought German girls were cute, he said "just don't get involved with them", I didn't listen and was nearly driven crazy by the Fraulein I gave my best shot with. OMG, what a nightmare. I have no idea how to understand what German girls are on about or what they want in a guy. Actually, I find it similar with all European females. Stop at acquaintanceship with them.
Is there anyone else who gets crippling social anxiety only in Berlin or Germany? Anyone else who feels vaguely guilty being themselves or enjoying life?
I was recently out of Germany for a bit and I saw people greeting each other in public and smiling at each other. The food had taste and was well made. The sun came out. A stranger said hello to me in passing and I scowled at him in suspicion. What have I become?
I forgot about the existence of this website, but I remember venting in here.. I moved to the UK 4 years ago, and although the crazy lefty mentality is strong in here (not as much as in Berlin) at least I'm not as miserable as I was back then. Reading words like spaeti and berghain gives me a bit of nausea. For those who are stuck in there, set yourself free ASAP. Wish you all the best
Congratulations, you escaped becoming emotional Soylent Green. The moronic lefties here are worse than anywhere else I've been, they're insufferable. The feminists are the worst and the place is now over run with muslims. Four mosques now in my little kiez.
It would be nice to meet one German that doesn’t slightly creep me out
Why do Germans get dressed up as ridiculous movie or series characters all the time? I swear, I see weird witches or dragonball or freaks of nature every weekend. What for?
North America and UK is all about safe spaces and Germany openly sexually harassed people, people die constantly in clubs, suicide, etc and rape and nobody discusses it? Fuckk
But honestly, to endure that negative and bleakness you should have self-awareness - tons of it - and create your own bubble which has to be resistant to outside influence. Also, find other foreign friends that are just as strong and aware as you. Either that or be a loner and live close to nature, which is really beautiful in Germany, unlike the people
German newspapers aren't even allowed to report on suicides unless they are particularly newsworthy, such as when someone sets themself on fire in front of an embassy. The claimed reason is because it would cause more suicide otherwise. I really wish I were making this up.
Lmao all of Germany is a safe space. You can go to prison for up to 2 years for hurting someone's feelings, you can be forced to pay 2-3 months' salary for moving your hand the wrong way. Germany's the PC capital of the world on paper, but these laws are only enforced against some people.
On Friday while I was walking home I came across some weird guy. He was dressed like a transgender wizard (he had a weird robe made of silk and was wearing a dress underneath it). He also had one of those weird hairdos where it's all shaved except a little tail in the back, like a Hare Krisna or some other kind of new age cult. I tried to avoid eye contact because someone who puts that much energy into being such a freak is probably obnoxious. Anyway he pointed at me and acted like he was putting a spell on me and daid something like "vai victus". Okay, typical retarded German druggie I thought BUT I was sick all weekend after that. What the fuck? I know this sounds crazy but it's 100% true. If I see him again I am going to kick his ass.
Guys, I’m desperate. I’m highly qualified and have achieved extraordinary things in my life so far (of course, all that is useless in Germany because they have no idea about anything that’s different from an ausbildung). Where should I move to? I’m very ambitious and work very hard to achieve things. But Germany keeps treating me like an unskilled worker (when I have mSc and all of that). Where to move to? Any thoughts?
UK, US, Switzerland even though they're basically Germans BUT they have less of a nanny state and wages that are like 2x what's normal in Berlin. Singapore or Australia if you are so put off by Europe from your bad experience in Berlin (can't really blame you if you are). In general, unless you moved to some war torn country I can't really see how life could suck more than in Berlin.
Germany can never achieve the level of achievement of the USA because of the negative (not pessimistic, just downright negative) mentality of the people there. A German word you expats may not be aware of is "Traumtänzer". It basically means "daydreamer" (Traum=dream, Tänzer=dancer). Most of the hustlers and extremely successful Americans people look up to and whose quotes abound in motivational videos are what the average German would call a "Traumtänzer": people who have a vision of what their life should be like and go all the way until they make those dreams happen.
Foreigners who arrive in Germany with big plans for their lifes are in for lots of disappointment. You yourselves are probably more qualified than your German counterparts, but due to Germany being such a restrictive and racist country, climbing up the social ladder is rendered pretty much impossible. I don't know of many foreigners who arrived in Germany and somehow ended up living the life. Most of them are lucky if they manage to rent a small appartment for the entire family and drive a small car (often a second-hand one).
If you want to hustle and become the best version of your self, avoid Germany. Germans are notoriously cold, blunt, rude and negative. They will not build you up, but bring you down. They don't even like it when their own countrymen are successful (refer to one of the posts below), so it is expected that they won't want foreigners to make it. Germany offers foreigners the chance to study (and the chance for landlords to make money off naive foreigners), but you will be discriminated on the job market. You will be discriminated in your everyday life. You will either leave the country feeling frustrated that you wasted so much time, effort and money in what was advertised as a land full of opportunities, or you will stay and either indulge in alcohol or drugs to alleviate the mental strain or just become German and end up as a soulless carcass.
Perfect post. I came to Germany because of a German girl. Got here and realized that, by default, all door were closed to me. I believed the hype and that I was jusr doing things wrong so I tried to Germanize. I went to German university, even got a German master's. After graduation I realized that all doors are still closed to me. Doesn't matter how much you try here, as a foreigner you will always be stuck in a dead end, low level job. I earn enough to save about 200eur per month max. And I am even a white, German-looking foreigner who speaks very good German. Cannot imagine how bad things are for blacks and asians here.
What also gets me down is looking at what my friends from high school have accomplished. They own houses, have families with kids, own boats and rental homes. Then I look at my "friends" here (I find it difficult to consider any German a friend. They're passing acquaintances.) and I see what they've accomplished. Over 40 and still renting the same apartment for 15 years, no car at all, no long-term financial planning, nothing. Some are in thrir late 30s and still living with roommates. Almost none of my "friends" ever bothered getting married because that's just too conservative for Berlin.
Germany doesn't feel anything like the Germany-worship you see all over the internet makes you think it'd feel. I honestly feel like I am stuck in a sort of prison here, and the low pay means it will be a LONG time before I am able to leave.
If you're new here and think the problems you notice are you then just get out immediately. Don't study here, don't settle for a job below your intelligence, don't mingle with Germans. If you have to stay here then find a company full of foreigners, if possible. Dealing with Germans 24/7 will rob you of your self respect and eventually you'll start to believe you are inferior.
Moving here was undoubtedly the biggest mistake of my life. This city is evil or cursed or something. I honestly believe that.
All true, just wanted to add one thing. The only way I managed to deal with life in Berlin was getting drunk or higg everyday after work. In the long run it wrecked me health-wise. Been completely sober now for about a year and this place gets worse by the day.
'Germany doesn't feel anything like the Germany-worship you see all over the internet makes you think it'd feel'
I totally get that. If one were to take a short holiday in Germany (2-3 weeks or so) then one might easily be impressed or taken in by the hype. Spend a few months (or longer) there, then you start to get a very different picture of what it is.
Mate what's up with German girls? So many send mixed signals and are complicated. Met a girl recently who was even worse in that regard even by German girls standards. Totally dazed and confused.
It's honestly Avoidant Personality Disorder. Almost all Germans have it. They oscillate between mania and depression and they are nearly incapable of communicating. Even nice Berliners have huge problems being honest and talking about difficult, meaningful things.
99.9% of Germans have mental issues. Really. Even when I meet really nice germans, it’s not long before I realize there’s something fishy about them. This is a sick society. Not even germans themselves can endure it. You know what’s really funny? Most Germans living abroad have the same opinion as we BHers have. Ask them and you’ll see. “That mentality”, “it’s because of my fellow countrymen that I’m abroad”, “German society is selfish”, “jealous” etc. Where there’s smoke, there’s fire. A sick society